Small Group Deep Study Guide

Faithful in Every : Place Faithful in Our Love

FBCKC Christopher D King

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This small group deep study guide draws directly from Christopher D King's sermon “Faithful in Every : Place Faithful in Our Love” so you can keep engaging with the message all week. Read, reflect, and share it with your small group or friends.

DEEP STUDY GUIDE: LOVING ONE ANOTHER

Based on John 13:34-35

INTRODUCTION

This comprehensive study guide explores Jesus' commandment to love one another from John 13:34-35. The sermon highlighted that this love is not optional but commanded, and serves as the primary identifying mark of Christ's disciples. This study will delve deeper into the theological, historical, and practical dimensions of this crucial Christian imperative.

I. SCRIPTURE FOUNDATION

Primary Text: John 13:34-35 (NKJV)

"A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another."

Context

The setting for this commandment is profoundly significant. Jesus delivers these words during the Last Supper, just hours before His arrest and crucifixion. Consider:

  • Judas has just left to betray Jesus (John 13:21-30)
  • Jesus knows Peter will soon deny Him (John 13:36-38)
  • The disciples will scatter when Jesus is arrested (Matthew 26:31)
  • Jesus is giving His final, most important instructions before His death

Textual Analysis

  1. "A new commandment"

    • In what sense was this commandment "new"? The command to love was present in the Old Testament (Leviticus 19:18).
    • What makes it new is the standard: "as I have loved you" - Christ's sacrificial love becomes the model.
    • The Greek word for "new" (καινὴν/kainēn) suggests something fresh and unprecedented in quality, not merely recent in time.

  2. "Love one another"

    • The Greek term used is "ἀγαπᾶτε" (agapate), indicating sacrificial, unconditional love.
    • This is not merely affection (phileo) or romantic love (eros), but divine love that chooses to act regardless of feelings.
    • The reciprocal nature ("one another") establishes community responsibility.

  3. "As I have loved you"

    • Christ's love becomes the measuring standard for our love.
    • His love was:
      • Sacrificial (John 15:13)
      • Unconditional (Romans 5:8)
      • Serving (John 13:1-17, foot washing)
      • Forgiving (Luke 23:34)
      • Reconciling (2 Corinthians 5:18-19)

  4. "By this all will know"

    • Love becomes the primary apologetic for Christianity.
    • Not doctrine alone, not miracles, not eloquence, but love identifies Christ's followers.
    • The term "all" (πάντες/pantes) includes both believers and unbelievers - our love is a witness to the world.

II. THEOLOGICAL DIMENSIONS

A. Love as Command vs. Emotion

  1. The Nature of Biblical Love

    • Love in Scripture is primarily volitional (a choice), not merely emotional.
    • The sermon emphasized: "We don't fall into love. We don't fall out of love."
    • Biblical love involves commitment regardless of feelings.
    • Love as action: 1 John 3:18 - "Let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth."

  2. Love as Obedience

    • Jesus links love with obedience: "If you love me, keep my commands" (John 14:15)
    • Love for God and others is not optional for believers (Matthew 22:36-40)
    • Obedience to this command demonstrates authentic discipleship

B. The Trinitarian Foundation of Love

  1. God's Nature as Love

    • "God is love" (1 John 4:8, 16) - love is not merely what God does but who God is
    • The Trinity as eternal loving community: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit
    • Our love reflects and participates in divine love

  2. Christ's Example

    • Incarnation as an act of love (Philippians 2:5-8)
    • Crucifixion as the ultimate demonstration of love (Romans 5:8)
    • Resurrection as the triumph of love over death (1 Corinthians 15:54-57)

  3. The Holy Spirit's Role

    • Love as fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22)
    • The Spirit enables supernatural love beyond human capacity
    • "God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit" (Romans 5:5)

III. DEEPER ANALYSIS OF KEY CONCEPTS

A. The Specificity of Christian Love

  1. "One Another" (ἀλλήλους/allēlous)

    • As noted in the sermon, Jesus uses "allos" (one of the same kind) not "heteros" (one of a different kind)
    • This specific command focuses on love within the Christian community
    • While Christians are called to love all people, this particular command emphasizes loving fellow believers

  2. The Church as Family

    • The New Testament consistently portrays the church as family (1 Timothy 5:1-2)
    • Family love involves commitment beyond convenience or preference
    • Family relationships cannot be easily abandoned (unlike restaurant service, as mentioned in the sermon)

B. The Witness of Christian Love

  1. Apologetic Power

    • Love as evidence for the truth of Christianity (John 17:20-23)
    • Tertullian (early church father) reported that pagans said of Christians: "See how they love one another"
    • Historical impact: Early church growth was fueled by distinctive Christian love

  2. Counter-Cultural Nature

    • Roman society valued strength, power, and status
    • Christian love inverted values: serving, sacrificing, embracing the marginalized
    • Today's individualistic culture makes Christian community love equally counter-cultural

C. The Cost of Love

  1. Sacrifice

    • "Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one's life for one's friends" (John 15:13)
    • Love requires dying to self-interest (Philippians 2:3-4)
    • Practical sacrifices: time, resources, comfort, preferences

  2. Forgiveness

    • Love necessitates forgiveness (Ephesians 4:32)
    • Forgiveness is not optional: "Forgive as the Lord forgave you" (Colossians 3:13)
    • Distinction between forgetting and forgiving (as mentioned in sermon)

IV. BIBLICAL CROSS-REFERENCES

Love Commands Throughout Scripture

  1. Old Testament Foundations

    • Leviticus 19:18 - "Love your neighbor as yourself"
    • Deuteronomy 6:5 - "Love the LORD your God with all your heart..."
    • Proverbs 17:17 - "A friend loves at all times..."

  2. Jesus' Teaching

    • Matthew 5:43-48 - Love your enemies
    • Matthew 22:36-40 - The greatest commandments
    • John 15:12-17 - Love each other as I have loved you

  3. Apostolic Teaching

    • Romans 12:9-10 - "Love must be sincere... Be devoted to one another in love"
    • 1 Corinthians 13 - The "love chapter"
    • 1 Peter 1:22 - "Love one another deeply, from the heart"
    • 1 John 4:7-21 - Extended teaching on love

Related Passages on Christian Unity

  1. John 17:20-23 - Jesus' prayer for unity among believers
  2. Ephesians 4:1-6 - Unity in the body of Christ
  3. Philippians 2:1-11 - Unity through humility and Christ's example
  4. Colossians 3:12-14 - "And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity"

V. HISTORICAL AND CULTURAL CONTEXT

A. First Century Understanding

  1. Jewish Context

    • Love of neighbor was established in Torah (Leviticus 19:18)
    • Debates existed about who qualified as "neighbor" (Luke 10:25-37)
    • Sectarian divisions (Pharisees, Sadducees, Essenes) created boundaries

  2. Greco-Roman Context

    • Patron-client relationships dominated social structures
    • Friendship was typically between social equals
    • Christian love crossed social, ethnic, and gender boundaries

B. Early Church Practice

  1. Radical Community

    • Acts 2:44-47, 4:32-35 - Sharing possessions
    • Care for widows and orphans (James 1:27)
    • Collection for Jerusalem poor (2 Corinthians 8-9)

  2. Historical Impact

    • Christians' care during plagues (249-262 AD and 310 AD)
    • Emperor Julian (the Apostate) complained: "The impious Galileans support not only their poor, but ours as well"
    • Distinctive love as a key factor in Christianity's spread

VI. CHALLENGES TO LOVING OTHERS

A. Theological Challenges

  1. Sin and Brokenness

    • Our fallen nature resists selfless love
    • Self-centeredness as the essence of sin
    • The need for regeneration to truly love (1 John 4:7)

  2. Theological Disagreements

    • Balancing truth and love (Ephesians 4:15)
    • Unity without compromising essential doctrine
    • Distinguishing between primary and secondary issues

B. Relational Challenges

  1. Church Conflict

    • Personal offenses and grievances
    • Addressing sin while maintaining love (Matthew 18:15-20)
    • Personality differences and communication styles

  2. Difficult People

    • Loving the unlovable within the church
    • Dealing with toxic behaviors
    • Setting boundaries while maintaining love

C. Cultural Challenges

  1. Individualism

    • Western emphasis on personal rights vs. community responsibility
    • Consumer mentality toward church relationships
    • Digital relationships replacing embodied community

  2. Polarization

    • Political and cultural divisions affecting church unity
    • Echo chambers reinforcing division
    • Tribalism within Christianity

VII. DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

Theological Reflection

  1. How does the command to love differ from the world's understanding of love? What makes Christian love distinctive?

  2. In what sense is Jesus' command to love "new" when love was already commanded in the Old Testament?

  3. How does the Trinity (Father, Son, and Holy Spirit) provide both the model and power for Christian love?

  4. The sermon stated: "You don't deserve love and you don't deny love. You don't earn it." How does this statement reflect the gospel? How does it challenge our natural tendencies?

  5. What is the relationship between love and truth in Christian community? Can love exist without truth or truth without love?

Textual Analysis

  1. Examine John 13:34-35 in several translations. What nuances do you notice? How do different translations help illuminate the meaning?

  2. How does the context of the Last Supper and Jesus' imminent crucifixion shape our understanding of this commandment?

  3. What does Jesus mean by "as I have loved you"? List specific ways Jesus demonstrated love to His disciples.

  4. Why does Jesus make love the primary identifying mark of discipleship rather than doctrine, worship practices, or other aspects of faith?

  5. How does this passage connect to Jesus' prayer for unity in John 17? What is the relationship between love and unity?

Personal Application

  1. The sermon distinguished between "liking" and "loving." Where in your life are you called to love someone you may not naturally like?

  2. What specific relationships in your church community need attention, forgiveness, or reconciliation? What steps can you take this week?

  3. The sermon stated: "It's only those that you love and you're the closest to that have the power to hurt your feelings." Reflect on a time when you were hurt by someone in the church. How did you respond? How might you respond differently now?

  4. In what ways might your small group become more intentional about demonstrating love for one another?

  5. What practical sacrifices might love require of you in your current season of life?

Cultural Engagement

  1. The sermon suggested: "If we ever would quit squabbling and bickering and battling each other and quit being in competition with one another... we would see a great outbreak of the Holy Spirit working in revival in our churches." How have you seen disunity hinder the church's witness?

  2. How can Christians demonstrate love in a polarized culture? What practices might help bridge divides?

  3. How might a watching world distinguish between authentic Christian love and mere tolerance or acceptance?

  4. What are some ways your church could more effectively demonstrate love to:

    • Fellow believers within your congregation?
    • Christians in other churches and denominations?
    • The broader community?

  5. How might technology help or hinder our ability to love one another in the church?

VIII. PRACTICAL APPLICATION

A. Cultivating Love Through Spiritual Disciplines

  1. Prayer Practices

    • Praying for those you struggle to love
    • Confessing lack of love as sin
    • Asking for supernatural capacity to love

  2. Scripture Meditation

    • Regular reflection on biblical passages about love
    • Meditating on Christ's love demonstrated at the cross
    • Memorizing 1 Corinthians 13

  3. Community Practices

    • Regular fellowship beyond Sunday services
    • Vulnerability in small groups
    • Serving alongside others

B. Practical Expressions of Love

  1. In Times of Need

    • Providing meals during illness or crisis
    • Financial support for those struggling
    • Practical help with childcare, transportation, etc.

  2. In Daily Life

    • Active listening without judgment
    • Speaking words of affirmation and encouragement
    • Prioritizing relationships over tasks

  3. In Conflict

    • Quick to forgive (Ephesians 4:26-27)
    • Addressing issues directly rather than gossiping
    • Seeking reconciliation proactively

C. Congregational Practices

  1. Structural Considerations

    • Organizing church life to facilitate relationships
    • Creating spaces and times for meaningful connection
    • Evaluating programs by how they foster love

  2. Leadership Modeling

    • Leaders demonstrating vulnerability and forgiveness
    • Addressing conflict in healthy ways
    • Prioritizing people over programs

  3. Cross-Generational Love

    • Intentional integration of different age groups
    • Mentoring relationships
    • Honoring wisdom of older members while embracing energy of younger ones

IX. CASE STUDIES FOR DISCUSSION

  1. Church Conflict A church member has publicly criticized a decision made by church leadership. Tensions are high, and people are taking sides. How can love be demonstrated by all parties in this situation?

  2. Political Differences Two longtime members of your small group have strong, opposing political views. Recent events have caused tension between them that is affecting the whole group. How can they love each other despite deep disagreements?

  3. Difficult Personality There's a person in your church who is consistently negative, critical, and drains energy from others. How can you and others show Christ-like love to this person without enabling unhealthy behavior?

  4. Betrayal and Forgiveness A church member has deeply hurt you through betrayal of trust or spreading false information about you. How do you practice forgiveness and love while also establishing appropriate boundaries?

  5. Cross-Cultural Love Your church is becoming more diverse with members from different cultural backgrounds. Misunderstandings and different expectations about church life are creating tension. How can love bridge these cultural differences?

X. RESOURCES FOR FURTHER STUDY

Books

  1. The Four Loves by C.S. Lewis - Classic exploration of different types of love
  2. Love or Die: Christ's Wake-up Call to the Church by Alexander Strauch
  3. The Mark of the Christian by Francis Schaeffer
  4. Life Together by Dietrich Bonhoeffer
  5. Speaking the Truth in Love by David Powlison

Articles and Essays

  1. "The Law of Christ: Theological and Ethical Implications of the Command to Love One Another" (Journal of the Evangelical Theological Society)
  2. "Love as the Identifying Mark of the Church" by D.A. Carson
  3. "The Revolutionary Christian Way of Love" by N.T. Wright

Bible Study Resources

  1. Word studies on agapē, phileō, and other Greek terms for love
  2. Commentary on John's Gospel, particularly chapters 13-17
  3. Thematic study of love throughout 1 John

Media Resources

  1. Lectures by Timothy Keller on love and community
  2. "The Compelling Community" podcast series
  3. RightNow Media resources on Christian relationships

XI. PRAYER GUIDE

Personal Prayer Focus

  1. Confession

    • Confess specific ways you have failed to love others in the church
    • Acknowledge self-centeredness and pride that hinder love

  2. Petition

    • Ask for supernatural capacity to love difficult people
    • Pray for wisdom in expressing love appropriately

  3. Thanksgiving

    • Thank God for specific expressions of love you've received
    • Express gratitude for Christ's sacrificial love

Group Prayer Focus

  1. For Your Church

    • Unity amidst diversity
    • Healing of broken relationships
    • Growth in practical expressions of love

  2. For the Broader Church

    • Reconciliation between divided denominations and traditions
    • Cooperative ministry that demonstrates love to the world
    • Revival through authentic Christian community

  3. For Witness

    • That the world would see Christ through Christian love
    • For courage to love in counter-cultural ways
    • For opportunities to explain the source of Christian love

CONCLUSION

Jesus' command to love one another stands as the cornerstone of Christian community and witness. This love is not based on emotion or convenience but on Christ's own sacrificial example. It requires supernatural empowerment through the Holy Spirit and consistent choice to prioritize others above self. As we grow in loving one another, we not only experience the life God intends for His church but also provide the most compelling evidence of Christ's transforming power to a watching world.

"By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another." (John 13:35)

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