This small group discussion guide draws directly from Wayne Church's sermon “Wayne Church Online - 2026-04-27” so you can keep engaging with the message all week. Read, reflect, and share it with your small group or friends.
Small Group Discussion Guide
"Be Perfect: Growing Into the Love of God"
Based on the Sermon from Matthew 5:43–48 Wayne Church | Small Group Series: "Hard Sayings of Jesus"
A Note to Facilitators: Welcome, and thank you for leading your group this week! You don't need to be a theological expert to guide a great conversation — your job is simply to create a safe, open space where people can think, share, and grow together. Read through this guide beforehand, pick the questions that feel right for your group, and trust the Spirit to do the rest. You've got this.
OVERVIEW
(For the Facilitator — Read Before Your Meeting)
This week's sermon explored one of Jesus's most challenging commands: "Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect" (Matthew 5:48). Rather than calling us to flawless performance, Jesus is inviting us into a growing, grace-filled maturity in love — love for God, love for neighbor, love for enemy, and even love for ourselves. Drawing on John Wesley's concept of "Christian perfection," the sermon reminded us that this kind of love isn't something we achieve alone or all at once. It's a journey, sustained by God's grace, that slowly shapes our hearts to look more and more like Jesus. The sermon was delivered against the backdrop of real-world violence, making the call to love enemies not just theological — but urgent and personal.
GETTING STARTED
Before Your Group Meets
- Pray for each person in your group by name
- Read Matthew 5:38–48 in full (the broader context helps)
- Choose your questions in advance — you won't have time for all of them, and that's okay
- Prepare the space to be warm and welcoming
- Print copies of this guide or share it digitally ahead of time
Suggested Time Budget (60–90 minutes)
| Section | Time |
|---|---|
| Welcome & Icebreaker | 5–10 min |
| Scripture Reading | 5 min |
| Discussion Questions | 30–45 min |
| Personal Application | 10–15 min |
| Prayer Focus | 5–10 min |
| Total | 60–90 min |
SECTION 1: ICEBREAKER
(5–10 minutes)
Start light. This question is designed to get everyone talking before diving into deeper territory.
Choose one of the following:
Option A (Fun & accessible)
"What's a song from your childhood or teenage years that you still remember the words to — and what did that song mean to you at the time?"
Option B (More reflective)
"Think about someone in your life who seems to genuinely love people well — even difficult people. What is it about them that stands out to you?"
[Leader Tip] Option A connects naturally to the sermon's opening reference to Hannah Montana's "Nobody's Perfect." If your group enjoys a little humor and pop culture, go with Option A — it's a great on-ramp to the sermon's central tension. Option B works well for groups who prefer to get to the heart of things a little faster.
SECTION 2: SCRIPTURE READING
(5 minutes)
Have someone in the group read the passage aloud. Encourage the group to listen as if hearing it for the first time.
Key Passage: Matthew 5:43–48 (NIV)
"You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect."
A Little Context to Share With Your Group
(You can read this aloud or summarize it in your own words)
This passage comes from the Sermon on the Mount (Matthew 5–7), which is Jesus's longest recorded teaching. In it, Jesus repeatedly takes a familiar religious rule and pushes it deeper — not to make life harder, but to reveal what God's kingdom actually looks like from the inside out. The phrase "You have heard that it was said... but I say to you" would have been startling to his audience. Jesus isn't abolishing the law — he's fulfilling it by revealing its true heart: love.
The word translated "perfect" here is the Greek word teleios, which means complete or mature — brought to its full intended purpose. Like a fruit that has fully ripened, or a person who has grown into who they were always meant to be. This is not about being flawless. It's about being whole in love.
Related Passages (For Reference During Discussion)
- Matthew 22:37–39 — The two great commandments (love God, love neighbor)
- Romans 5:8 — God loved us while we were still sinners
- 1 John 4:7–12 — Love comes from God; loving one another reflects God
- Luke 6:27–36 — Luke's version of this same teaching
SECTION 3: DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
(30–45 minutes)
These questions are organized to move from observation → interpretation → application. You don't need to use all of them — choose 5–7 that feel right for your group. Questions marked with ★ are particularly recommended if you're short on time.
PART A: Opening the Conversation
(Observation — What Did We Hear?)
Question 1 ★
"The sermon described this as one of Jesus's 'hard sayings' — the kind that makes you go, 'Really, Jesus?' When you heard the command to 'be perfect,' what was your first reaction? What emotions or thoughts came up for you?"
[Leader Tip] This is a great opener because there's no wrong answer. Validate whatever people share — skepticism, relief, confusion, inspiration. The goal here is simply to surface the honest reactions in the room before moving toward understanding.
Question 2
"The preacher pointed out that Jesus doesn't just say, 'Try your best' or 'Do what you can.' He says 'Be perfect.' Before we dig into what that means, why do you think Jesus would use such a strong, seemingly impossible word? What do you think he was trying to do?"
Question 3 ★
"Jesus asks a pointed question: 'If you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Don't even the tax collectors do the same?' In today's world, who might Jesus use as his example instead of tax collectors — what group might make us squirm in the same way his audience did?"
[Leader Tip] This question invites creative, culturally relevant thinking. Encourage the group to think honestly rather than giving "church-safe" answers. The point is that Jesus's challenge cuts closer to home than we often admit. If the group gets stuck, offer a gentle prompt: "Who do we tend to write off as 'not like us'?"
PART B: Going Deeper
(Interpretation — What Does This Mean?)
Question 4 ★
"The sermon introduced John Wesley's idea of 'Christian perfection' — not perfection without flaw, but perfection in love. How does understanding 'perfect' as 'mature in love' or 'complete in love' change the way this command feels to you? Does it feel more possible? More challenging? Something else?"
Question 5
"The preacher described God's grace using the image of your favorite treat sitting in the middle of the room — freely offered, but requiring a response. How does that picture of grace shape the way we think about growing in love? Is it all on us, all on God, or something in between?"
[Leader Tip] This question touches on a classic theological conversation about grace and human responsibility. You don't need to resolve it — just explore it. If the group wants more depth, you can reference Romans 5:8 (God acts first) alongside Philippians 2:12–13 (we work out what God is working in us). Both are true and held in tension.
Question 6 ★
"The sermon named three dimensions of love that 'perfection' calls us toward: love of God, love of neighbor (including enemies), and love of self. Which of these three feels most natural to you? Which feels hardest — and why?"
Question 7
"The sermon was preached in the wake of news about violence — a reminder that this isn't just a theoretical teaching. How does the command to love enemies land differently when violence feels close and real? What does it look like to take Jesus seriously in that moment without minimizing the harm that's been done?"
[Leader Tip] This is the most emotionally sensitive question in the guide. Go slowly here. Some group members may have personal experiences with violence, loss, or injustice. Affirm that loving enemies doesn't mean excusing harm or pretending pain isn't real. The sermon itself began with a prayer of repentance about violence — that's a helpful frame.
PART C: Bringing It Home
(Application — What Does This Ask of Us?)
Question 8 ★
"The sermon said that when we begin to grow in this kind of love, 'we begin to pray differently, see the world differently, and listen differently' — even to people we disagree with. Where in your life right now do you sense God might be inviting you to see or listen differently?"
Question 9
"Jesus gave this teaching in community — surrounded by his disciples. The sermon emphasized that we can't grow in love alone. What does it look like for this group to help each other grow in the kind of love Jesus is describing? What would that kind of community actually feel like?"
Question 10
"The preacher closed by saying the goal isn't to have the house together, pick up the kids on time, or have the grocery shopping done — but to 'choose love in everything we do and see the image of God in every person we encounter, including ourselves.' What would it look like to practice that this week in one specific relationship or situation in your life?"
SECTION 4: PERSONAL APPLICATION
(10–15 minutes)
These questions are designed for more personal, reflective sharing. You might invite people to take 2 minutes to think quietly before sharing, or you could offer these as journaling prompts to take home.
Reflection 1
"Is there someone in your life right now who is genuinely hard for you to love — someone who feels like your 'enemy' in some sense? You don't need to name them. But what would one small, concrete act of love or prayer toward that person look like this week?"
Reflection 2
"The sermon included love of self as part of Christian perfection — not self-indulgence, but 'a grace-filled honesty about who we are as beloved children of God.' How do you tend to talk to yourself when you mess up or fall short? What might it look like to extend the same grace to yourself that God extends to you?"
Reflection 3
"Where in your life do you feel the most pressure to be 'perfect' by the world's standards — appearance, performance, productivity, parenting, career? How does Jesus's definition of perfection offer you freedom in that specific area?"
Reflection 4 (Optional — for groups ready for more vulnerability)
"Is there an area of your life where you've given up on growing — where you've told yourself, 'That's just the way I am'? What might it look like to open that area to God's grace and invite transformation there?"
✅ This Week's Challenge
Choose one (or invite group members to choose their own):
Option 1 — The Prayer Practice This week, identify one person who is difficult for you to love. Pray for them by name every day — not that they would change, but that God would bless them and that God would change your heart toward them.
Option 2 — The Listening Practice Have one conversation this week with someone whose views or lifestyle differ from yours. Go in with the goal of listening and understanding rather than debating or convincing. Afterward, ask yourself: What did I learn? Where did I see the image of God in this person?
Option 3 — The Grace Practice Each morning this week, begin your day by saying out loud: "I am a beloved child of God, and God's grace is at work in me today." Notice how this simple practice shapes how you treat yourself and others throughout the day.
Option 4 — The Service Practice Consider one way to show up for someone outside your usual circle this week — a neighbor, a coworker, someone you've been avoiding. It doesn't need to be dramatic. A text, a meal, a kind word. Just one step toward loving beyond your comfort zone.
SECTION 5: PRAYER FOCUS
(5–10 minutes)
Close your time together in prayer. Here are some suggested approaches — choose what fits your group's culture:
Option A: Guided Group Prayer
Invite the group to pray together using these themes as a guide. You (the leader) can pray through each theme, or invite different group members to pray for each one:
Gratitude — Thank God for his grace that meets us before we even know we need it, and for the community we have in this group.
Confession — Honestly name the ways we default to loving only those who are easy to love, and ask for forgiveness and a new heart.
Intercession — Pray for those affected by violence in our world, our city, and our community. Pray for those in leadership. Pray for those whose names never make the news.
Transformation — Ask God to grow in us the kind of love that is patient, generous, and enemy-including — the love that reflects the heavenly Father.
Each Other — Invite group members to share one specific prayer request, and close by praying for one another by name.
Option B: The Sermon's Closing Prayer
(You may read this aloud together as a group prayer, adapted from the sermon's closing prayer)
God, creator, maker, and perfector of us all — create in us a clean heart so that we may know how to love ourselves more fully, love our neighbors more completely, and love you more wholly. Break our hearts for what breaks yours, so that we may see the needy, include the marginalized, and at all times pursue peace and love. Change our minds and our hearts to know that perfection is as you define it — not performance, but love. In the name of Jesus, who showed us what that love looks like. Amen.
Option C: Popcorn Prayer
Invite anyone who wants to pray aloud to offer a one-sentence prayer. This can be a prayer of thanks, a request, or simply a word or phrase. Close the time yourself with a brief blessing.
SECTION 6: OPTIONAL DEEP DIVE
(For groups with extra time or who want to go further — not required)
Deep Dive Question 1 — Wesley's Journey of Grace
"John Wesley described grace as something that meets us before we know we need it (what he called 'prevenient grace'), that saves us when we respond to it ('justifying grace'), and that continues to transform us over a lifetime ('sanctifying grace'). How does this picture of grace as a journey rather than a single moment change how you think about your own spiritual life? Where do you see yourself in that journey right now?"
Deep Dive Question 2 — The Sermon on the Mount's Bigger Picture
"Read Matthew 5:17–20 together: Jesus says he hasn't come to abolish the Law but to fulfill it, and that our 'righteousness must surpass that of the Pharisees.' What do you think Jesus means by a righteousness that goes deeper than rule-following? How is this different from just trying harder?"
(Matthew 5:17–20 for reference:)
"Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them. For truly I tell you, until heaven and earth disappear, not the smallest letter, not the least stroke of a pen, will by any means disappear from the Law until everything is accomplished. Therefore anyone who sets aside one of the least of these commands and teaches others accordingly will be called least in the kingdom of heaven, but whoever practices and teaches these commands will be called great in the kingdom of heaven. For I tell you that unless your righteousness surpasses that of the Pharisees and the teachers of the law, you will certainly not enter the kingdom of heaven."
Deep Dive Question 3 — Love as a Practice, Not Just a Feeling
"C.S. Lewis once wrote: 'Do not waste time bothering whether you "love" your neighbor; act as if you did. As soon as we do this we find one of the great secrets. When you are behaving as if you loved someone, you will presently come to love them.' Do you agree with this? How does this idea connect to what Jesus is commanding in Matthew 5? What are the limits of this approach?"
FACILITATOR'S QUICK REFERENCE
Tear out or bookmark this section for easy access during your meeting.
If Discussion Goes Quiet...
- "What's one word that describes how this passage makes you feel?"
- "Is there anything in the sermon you found yourself pushing back on? What was it?"
- "What's one question this passage leaves you with?"
If Discussion Goes Long...
- Gently redirect: "That's a really rich thought — let's hold onto it and move to our next question."
- Prioritize the ★ questions if time is short
- It's okay to skip Personal Application and use it as a take-home
If a Sensitive Topic Comes Up...
- Affirm the person's honesty: "Thank you for sharing that."
- Avoid rushing to fix or resolve: "That's something worth sitting with."
- Remind the group: "We're all on this journey together."
Encouraging Quieter Group Members
- Give thinking time before asking for responses
- Invite (but never pressure): "Is there anything you'd want to add?"
- Affirm all contributions, however brief
Key Concepts at a Glance
| Term | Simple Definition |
|---|---|
| Teleios | Greek for "perfect" — means complete, mature, brought to full purpose |
| Sermon on the Mount | Jesus's extended teaching in Matthew 5–7 on life in God's kingdom |
| Christian Perfection | John Wesley's term for a heart fully governed by love — not sinless, but love-shaped |
| Prevenient Grace | God's grace that works in us even before we respond to it |
| Sanctification | The ongoing process of being shaped and transformed by God's grace |
This guide was prepared for Wayne Church Small Groups. Feel free to adapt questions to fit your group's unique needs and context. The goal isn't to cover every question — it's to go deep with a few.
May your group encounter the grace that makes love possible.
📧 Questions for the pastoral team? Visit wayne.org/connect
"Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect." — Matthew 5:48